“We just getting tired of getting involved in wars we can’t win,” foreign secretary Philip Hammond said.
“But ISIS and Ebola can’t get enough of the whole killing thing. For ISIS it’s in their blood, and as for Ebola it’s also in saliva and urine.”
The plan to get Ebola and ISIS around the table to agree to fight each other and leave the rest of us alone hasn’t been a simple one.
“After much deliberation we have agreed to all meet in the UK. ISIS have plenty of fighters already here, and it’s the only country Ebola can get in.”