Surrounded by security 24 hours a day, having someone else decide what you will eat, not voting in elections, being transported in armoured vehicles often with a police escort, having sex with unsightly people, menial work to pass the time and earn your weekly wage and all the tax payers’ expense have all been good practice for the future monarch.
Today’s Weather: Hazy
Harold Tweets…My Tweets
- Japanese boy overjoyed Boris is recovering “I’ve trained for 1583 days and I want my revenge”
- Huge increase in coronavirus testing as the Wombles take power
- Delivery van driver now graduate only profession as middle class realise its importance
- Forget Joe Wicks: Michael Gove’s 5PM spin class is nation’s favourite workout
- World wide wahey: delighted animals tell humans to stay on lockdown forever
- UK to give world a bloody good laugh by getting morons to panic buy McDonald’s
- Anti-vaxxers devastated there is no coronavirus vaccine they can refuse to take
- January: still no end in sight.
What they’re saying about the Evening Harold!
"Way better than the Guardian" - Jeremy Corbyn
"Ha - this piece of wit contains a lot of truth" - Brian May.
THE REAL BRIAN MAY!!!
"I just love this paper.... site... web thingy. Makes my day, every day" - Phil Burfoot
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Enjoy some older Haroldy goodness