Surrounded by security 24 hours a day, having someone else decide what you will eat, not voting in elections, being transported in armoured vehicles often with a police escort, having sex with unsightly people, menial work to pass the time and earn your weekly wage and all the tax payers’ expense have all been good practice for the future monarch.
Today’s Weather: Cock Robin
Harold Tweets…My Tweets
- Hard Brexit to be broadcast in soft focus, BBC confirms
- Boris Johnson’s wife votes Leave
- Step-ladder ‘never really felt like one of the family’
- Trump recalls ‘Aretha Franklin’s beautiful singing at my inauguration’
- Village kids urged to store up their own piss as Farage goes ‘back on the road’
- David Cameron: hut dwelling former PM thinks he’s really a shepherd
- Villagers slammed for holding Corbyn painting party
- Ben Stokes found ‘not guilty’. Now the nation gets to have its say
What they’re saying about the Evening Harold!
"Way better than the Guardian" - Jeremy Corbyn
"Ha - this piece of wit contains a lot of truth" - Brian May.
THE REAL BRIAN MAY!!!
"I just love this paper.... site... web thingy. Makes my day, every day" - Phil Burfoot
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Enjoy some older Haroldy goodness