Surrounded by security 24 hours a day, having someone else decide what you will eat, not voting in elections, being transported in armoured vehicles often with a police escort, having sex with unsightly people, menial work to pass the time and earn your weekly wage and all the tax payers’ expense have all been good practice for the future monarch.
Today’s Weather: Cock Robin
Harold Tweets…My Tweets
- ‘It’s not too late to save my career’ says Boris Johnson
- Sex pests move to distance themselves from Tory minister
- England gripped with third-place playoff fever
- No more diving to rescue your football team, warns referee
- Grylls appointed as Minister for Survival
- England squander glorious chance to lose penalty shootout
- Frying pan or Fire? Cabinet split over which plan to let the EU reject
- Hero dog fetched fire brigade after locking its owner in car on hot day
What they’re saying about the Evening Harold!
"Way better than the Guardian" - Jeremy Corbyn
"Ha - this piece of wit contains a lot of truth" - Brian May.
THE REAL BRIAN MAY!!!
"I just love this paper.... site... web thingy. Makes my day, every day" - Phil Burfoot
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Enjoy some older Haroldy goodness