Spider ‘gave him the eyes’.
A local deviant has claimed that a spider he found in his kitchen was so sexy, it gave him a 4-hour erection.
Hagrid Evans told us that the arachnid has evolved over thousands of years specifically to ‘give him the horn’, and being a spider, instinctively went for his fly.
“I’ve always been a leg man, and this beauty had eight”, leered Evans. “I could tell I was in love, at least an incy wincy bit.”
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