“Clean up in aisle two. Another one’s got in.”
Aldi looks set to finally rid its car parks of Range Rovers, thanks to a range of french-sounding poisonous chocolates.
Choceur Malade, a high-end sweet filled with chunks and a thin green jus, is specifically targeted at ABC1s who spend too long reading wine labels.
“Our store is a ‘volks markt’, we sell burgers in tins, für Gott’s sake”, said store manager Helmut Braun. “We leave posh stuff piled up in the corners as ein trap for red-trousered fops.”
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