Tag Archives: Black Friday sales

RAF parcel bombing will deliver “authentic Black Friday experience”

lancaster

“Sorry you were out when we called. It’s in the back. Of beyond.”

The RAF will deliver all Harold’s on-line Black Friday orders in one big drop on Monday morning; from 10,000 feet.

Villagers too lazy to go to Dunstable but wanting authentic Black Friday fun will still get the experience by packing into the 5-a-side pitch like sardines, and having a shed-load of multi-coloured tat dropped on their heads.

“We’d hoped to get low level runs along the River Gluggle by the Battle of Britain Memorial flight.” Continue reading

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Black Friday chaos continues with passive / aggressive jibe in aisle 3 of local Waitrose

waitrosePolice were nearly called to the Harpenden Waitrose after a conversation between two customers over who should have the last jar of sacla organic pesto ended with a passive / aggressive jibe.

“The debate seemed civilised at first, with what seemed like routine pleasantries”, said Waitrose assistant manager Julie Fleck.

“But then the slightly older lady took the jar and said ‘it goes with your hair’ and then ‘you need it more than me’ as she placed it in the slightly younger lady’s trolley. The slightly older lady then marched off to aisle 4 and bought 10 blocks of our most expensive cheeses.”
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