“Aww… aren’t they lovely though?”
A hundred deaths in a Havana air crash came close to nudging the Royal wedding off the top spot on BBC news today.
“There were no Meghan Markle relatives on board,” explained the BBC’s Huw Edwards from Windsor Castle “which is the frankly unusual element of the story we used to justify covering it.”
Survivors were spoken to in hospital by the BBC Cuba correspondent, Will Grant, who asked which part of the Royal wedding they’d most been looking forward to and how they felt about missing the bride’s dress on live TV.
“I took off their oxygen masks to help them speak” said Grant “One whispered ‘Fuck off’, which was rather disrespectful in the circumstance. The other was clearly overwhelmed at being part of the Royal wedding in this way and simply said ‘gnnhhh … can’t … breathe …’ before losing consciousness.”
“So there you have it.” said Huw Edwards “Even on the other side of the Atlantic Ocean, people breathless about the first mixed-race American divorcee to marry into our wonderful Royal family.”
“Back to the studio now for any breaking Royal wedding news.”
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