Forget nuclear war worries: Wills & Kate have been at it again

Probably a Royal Command Performance

Nuclear holocaust and Brexit worries have been put into perspective by news that William and Kate have had another successful coupling.

Kensington Palace announced Kate’s pregnancy today but have not confirmed which position was used, leading to speculation that the modernising royals may have taken a less traditional approach.

The BBC’s Nicholas Witchell reports that, like its parents, the new foetus is showing a real concern for others, whilst its ability to put people at their ease is very reminiscent of Princess Diana. It is said to have its grandmother’s eyes.

With one Prince and Princess already in the nest, Ladbrokes are offering 100 to 1 on the third one being a lizard, or an entirely different gender altogether.

Former Royal servant Paul Burrell is not at all surprised, as Diana often told him that William would have “at least three children” and one of them would be called Paul. Details of their many cosy chats will be central to his new book “Princess Diana and her grandchildren: the untold stories” which will be written up over the next few days from Burrell’s original memories and published on Friday.