Emily Thornberry: “Monkey pilots, flying space-buggies, must go to Syria”

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“Ooh, look. The Tooth Fairy!”

Emily Thornberry has followed her calls for UK cargo drone and gps-guided parachute deployment in Syria, with a plea for “the RAF’s squadrons of monkey-driven space-buggies to be used in the cause of peace”.

“We should look at all options,” she says “including impossibilities and those based on imaginary resources.”

Thornberry believes MPs must stand up for principles, such as sending one’s children to comprehensive schools, if one’s party is against selection.

“So, I ask the government to put their mouth where their money is. Otherwise, what is the point of building state of the art space buggies, or training RAF monkeys at vast expense to fly them, if they’re never going to be used?”

“One might just as well invest in a party leader with no prospect of winning a general election.”

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