Good luck to Philomena finding a moment of wonder in all this
Lugubrious chronicler of the end times, Charlie Brooker, has announced that his yearly review of the news which is normally sixty minutes long will last more than a day in order to cover all the terrible things that have happened and that even with all the extra hours he’ll “have to leave a lot out.”
“It’s a nightmare,” Brooker said. “What to leave in, what to leave out: it’s all horrific. I’m looking over 2016 and when I’ve stopped wanting to hide under the bed I have to constantly quash the feeling that the only way to really sum it up is to dig a hole and scream into it while on one side the bore from the saloon bar in Hell tries to fill the hole with shit while on the other a bright orange walking sack of pussy and prejudice bellows about making holes great again as his minions pleasure themselves over a pile of dirty Klan hoods.”
“In short, it’s a bit of a bugger.”
Brooker also expressed regret that the show couldn’t go out live.
“Like most people I don’t trust 2016 an inch. I think it’ll contrive to end with a bang and a whimper. That’s just the sort of crap it would pull.”
2016 Wipe will be broadcast at the very end of the year. Assuming we’re all still here.
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