People who stayed up to stare at the moon are claiming it was ‘worth it’ as they were sacked across the country.
“Has the moon been?” asked Nigel Hostage as he was woken by his manager. “No, I’m not pissed, the man on the telly said it was going to be enormous.”
Despite being the same size since records began, the moon chose last night to ruin the lives of the suggestible. “There was a lunar eclipse, that’s why it was dark last night”, pleaded Jeremy Evans as he was marched off the premises. An imprint of his face still remains on his mouse mat.
A ‘super moon’ is a phenomenom that is still argued about by scientists. “It’s the same fucking moon, just go to bed”, said astronomer Derek Hostage, “is what my boss should have said, if he expected me to be fit for anything this morning.”