PSN is essential to access the extended capabilities of PlayStation games, such as online multiplayer modes and other network functions, but many people do not realise the main hardship facing video game fans in the stricken region.
“There are families who have lost everything to war and hunger,” explained Red Cross spokesman Barry Ping. “Basic essentials like Facebook and cable TV. For these people, keeping their children entertained while the relief effort is coordinated is proving very difficult.”
“Many of these families will have purchased a new PlayStation for Christmas, in the belief that it would keep everyone quiet for a bit. But tragically you can’t even start the thing up without network activation, which is impossible with PSN down. I’ve seen whole villages literally devastated.”
“This has spoiled our whole post-Christmas famine experience,” complained refugee and mother of four Talia Nafisa. “We were all set to fire up the new PS4 and play FIFA 15 until the food parcels arrived, and we can’t even log on. I think we should be compensated.”
On hearing that gamers as far afield as the UK were also suffering, Nafisa was full of sympathy for their shared plight. “It must be so hard for them, sitting in their well-heated non-destroyed front rooms with plentiful access to internet, movies and chocolate. I can only hope they manage to struggle through at this difficult time.”
“Now you’ll have to excuse me, my youngest child has started trying to eat his DUALSHOCK®4 wireless controller.”