Kim Kardashian to attempt world’s biggest dump

May contain crap

Never knowingly underexposed celebrity Kim Kardashian has announced that her next project is to attempt to do mankind’s biggest defecation.

Kardashian Publicity Assistant 114 said the most common reactions to Kim’s recent naked photo shoot was ‘wow, what a massive butt’ and ‘jeez, she is full of crap’, and it was Kim’s own idea to combine the two in the ‘world’s biggest dump’ project.

“Kim is so intelligent to think of the idea, but she is dedicated too. To ensure the success of the project she is even going to eat food” said Kardashian Publicity Assistant 114.

In common with other Kardashian projects such as having sex, getting married, and having a baby there will be round the clock coverage. There will also be merchandising spin-offs such as Kardashian toilet paper and Kim and Kayne crapping figurines.

“We are thinking of using a thermal imaging camera to track the food as it makes its way down the small intestine, or what Kim calls ‘the stomach bits’” said Kardashian Publicity Assistant 163.

“And the climax will come via the rectal-cam where viewers the world over will be able to see if Kim can pull off the world’s biggest dump. We just hope the whole thing doesn’t turn out to be hot air.”

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