Cyclist arrested after dramatic high-speed chase


Reckless maniac didn’t even have a bell.

PC Anita Flegg has been hailed a hero in Harold today following the dramatic arrest of a crazy cyclist who could have caused mayhem on the roads around Harold.

The speeding cyclist was spotted by eagle-eyed PC Flegg during a routine check of local cycle paths.

“He was travelling at an astonishing speed along the main road,” said PC Flegg, “and drinking from a bottle which he threw at me as he passed.”

The brave policewoman gave chase on her own bike but it soon became clear to her there was no chance of catching him. Fortunately the quick-thinking PC took a short cut across a field and reached the main road again well ahead of the speeding cyclist.  Hiding behind a hedge until he was in sight, she deployed her portable spike strip with precise timing.

“Now then Lewis Hamilton, where’s the fire?” she asked, as she helped the stunned man from the wreckage. A roadside breath test proved he was French.

He was arrested on several counts including reckless cycling, flouting litter laws, wearing lycra pants in public with a hideous yellow pullover and an ‘aggressive alien’ style helmet; and has now voluntarily deported himself to Dover to catch the next ferry back to ‘turdy France’ as he insisted on calling it.

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