Passengers miraculously survive flight stowed away in Ryanair cabin

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Following the news a 16 year-old stowed away in the landing gear of a Boeing 767 flying from California to Hawaii survived, passengers flying from Luton to somewhere within 150 miles of Dublin have described how they too miraculously survived the dangerous journey stowed away in the cabin of a Ryanair flight.

The passengers endured the flight at 34,000 feet whilst fighting the effects of a deadly frosty atmosphere generated by the cabin crew.

“We were lucky not to be crushed to death by the seat configuration,” one of the survivors told us. “Leg room was non-existent.

“The majority of us were unconscious for much of the flight. Apparently it’s the body’s way of dealing with harsh external factors and excessive charging for extras.”

The passengers were discovered by ground crew at Dublin as they wondered around, dazed and confused, on the Tarmac.

An aviation expert explained the chances of anyone surviving a flight in those awful conditions are very remote

“Most people would have walked off before it took off, but these passengers were obviously so desperate to leave Luton they risked their lives.

“Often in these cases the lack of food can prove to be a killer, but one look at the on-board meals shows the decision not to sell a kidney to afford it was probably a life or death decision.”

The normally bullish Ryanair chief, Michael O’Leary, has praised the passengers on their survival skills that saw them make the flight with only a few minor mental traumas reported. He has promised to contact them personally to discuss how they left the plane with their lives, without paying a premium.

Unfortunately we couldn’t get a longer statement from him as he was charging by the word.

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