Putin welcomes Eastern Asians; “Just leave the dogs alone.”


Following on from his comments that gay people can “feel free in your relationship but leave the children alone”, man of the world and Russian president Vladimir Putin has been rolling out the rainbow carpet to all people from all over the Globe.

“I would like to extend the strong yet moisturised manly hand of friendship to everyone,” Putin told media.

“People think I have a problem with farmers, but they are welcome, just as long as they don’t start fisting Russian cows.

“What they do in their country is fine but when invited to Russia they mustn’t act in a way my bigoted ignorance expects.

“I mean, I welcome all people from Eastern Asia, I will even give them a big manly bear hug when they get off the plane, just as long as they promise to leave our f**king dogs alone. Big angry dogs are there to make people look straight, not to be eaten.”

Speaking about the comments, David Cameron said he is glad Putin is relaxing his views but was concerned about the suggested links between homosexuality and peaodophilia.

“They are upsetting views but the Winter Olympics and World Cup give Russia a chance to modernise and abandon draconian fears and prejudices not seen in the UK for at least 10 years.”


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