Tag Archives: vampire

Wonga victims ‘allowed to fake compensation interest rates’


Fake lawyer worked for some right counts.

People who fell foul of Wonga’s badly made, fake lawyers are already fabricating their own interest rates for compensation.

Not content with using fake old people as well as a forged moral compass, Wonga avoided paying for real legal representation by using a sock puppet with two blood-sucking fangs.

Pippa Delaney from Harold has yet to settle on the final settlement figure.
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‘But I must have more blood’ says Blair


Pretty straight guy

Prince of Darkness and Supreme Evil Being Tony Blair has insisted that the West should again go to war in Iraq to provide him with a supply of the fresh blood of the innocents which he needs to retain his youth and immortality.

Commentators from across the political spectrum have denounced the returning of troops to the country as absolute insanity, but Blair is adamant that a resumption of conflict is the only way he he will be able to gorge on the human blood he so desperately craves.

“Look, I’m a pretty straight guy,” he explained to reporters this morning. “And, you know, my blood lust shall be sated. Great.”

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