All fixed now…Hague rides the popular petrol flume
Just 12 short years after the invasion of Afghanistan, William Hague has announced that the country is now ‘safe enough to take a nice, restful holiday in’.
With power being handed over to the Taliban in a traditional NATO ‘Washing of the Hands’ ceremony, Hague revealed that the first Kabul Butlins will open in a fortnight.
“It’s an all-inclusive resort, although that doesn’t include women”, revealed Hague. “You have to make some concessions to local brutal beliefs.”
Few would have thought that when the country was first bombed back to the stone age that it would claw its way up to a medieval state quite so quickly. But Hague insists Kabul itself is now ‘fewer than 100 years behind resorts such as Guantanamo, Somalia or Rhyl’.
Is geeking out a human right?
Cassie Fine and Naomi Adams owners of Harold’s role-playing games shop Dungeons & More Dungeons are once again petitioning the Home Office to allow them to accept Azure cards for payment.
‘The Azure card is issued to refugees seeking asylum in the UK who don’t have the right to work. The Home Office chooses which shops can accept it and the only one in Harold is Tesco Express,’ said an angry but determined Naomi Adams. ‘We’re petitioning the Home Office to recognise that geekdom is international and allow us to serve Harold’s refugee community.’ Continue reading
This soldier praised for resisting the urge to shoot
A decision to allow both Harold’s branch of the Territorial Army and the village’s morris dancers to share use of the village hall is to be reviewed. This follows a transportation error which saw the whole flange of morris dancers deployed to Kabul, Afghanistan.
The jingling hanky wavers were due to travel from the hall to Sidcup for the National Prancing Championships. Unfortunately a coach was also due at the hall to take the TA to RAF Brize Norton to fly out to the war-zone and take up a combat role against the Taliban, a coach the morris men accidentally but keenly boarded.
Hit with your stick HERE for more