Weather presenters in the UK have welcomed the ‘no’ vote in Scotland saying they are glad they still have the whole of the UK to cover and now won’t be forced to go part-time.
“Giving the Scotland forecast takes up 25% of our working time,” the BBC’s Tomasz Schafernaker told us.
“If an hourly two minute forecast had been reduced to a minute and a half, the subsequent pro rata pay cut would have had a devastating effect on weather people.
“It would have led to mortgage arrears and us losing our houses. High streets up and down the country would have been full of forecasters pointing aimlessly at any green wall they could find.”
Mr Schafernaker went on to say that the presenters were so energised by this result they may seek a pay rise from their employers, but conceded that may only be possible with a full on invasion of France.
Signs will be printed very locally
With exiting organisations currently all the rage, a third Harold councillor has declared they would ‘happily walk away from Bedfordshire tomorrow’.
Harold has already declared independence from Europe, NATO and Groupon, but the latest move could see the village become ‘more insular than many dared dream’.
“There are some good things about being in Bedfordshire”, Ron Ronsson admitted. “It’s a relatively small county, and not many people visit. But given an in/out referendum, I’d have to say ‘out’. It doesn’t do to dwell too long on the positives.”