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Drone pilot wins Victoria Cross

for valour

Although untraumatised, pilot will need years of occupational therapy.

A drone pilot, battling away in a reasonably comfortable lounge, has become the first remote combatant to achieve the Victoria Cross.

Despite a searing repetitive strain injury and being down to his last 2 bags of pretzels, John Stilgo continued to pour missiles into a deadly Afghanistan orphanage.

“I wasn’t concerned at all for my own safety”, revealed Stilgo. “Instinct took over. I just knew I had to push through if I wanted to beat the squadron’s highest score.”
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