Former Tory leader, Lord Howard has made the world just a little darker (again), by referencing the Falklands war when discussing Gibraltar, but he’s certain the Spanish won’t be offended at all.
“No, it’s fine, trust me. It won’t mean anything to Spain, as they’ve no links to Argentina.” said Howard “Apart from a shared heritage and culture. Oh, and the language, Spanish is it?”
“Most Spaniards won’t have even heard of the Falklands,” he went on “much less be able find it on a map. Sorry, the Malvinas? Not a name I know. Could you point it out on a map?”
The UK put its heads in its hands on Sunday morning after Howard, who has somehow managed to combine the roles of QC and National Idiot, emerged from his lair and, before the 9pm watershed, summoned forth the spirit of Margaret Thatcher, live on Sky News.
“What the f*ck was he thinking?” asked Colonal Thomas Hallet (retd) of Harold.”Our destroyers spend all their time in port, or waiting for the RAC to bring them back to port. We’d have to ask the French for a borrow of their aircraft carrier and then see if we could lease back some of the Harriers we sold to the Americans at £500 a pop. Have they scrapped that Vulcan yet?”