“I heard on the state news that the small and insignificant country America had attacked our internet, whatever that is,” one Pyongyang resident said.
“I was appalled and sincerely hope our supreme leader can fix it with his special fixing hammer. Then it can start doing whatever it is it does.
“I heard a rumour it was a communication device but I can’t see why we need more than the state approved plastic cup and string technology we already have”
With the Internet being the preserve of the elite in North Korea, a spokesman for the leadership said the west could expect a very strong reaction.
“Kim Jong-un is a tolerant guy, but messing with his broadband is something he won’t put up with.
“He fed his uncle to the dogs because he accidentally turned off the wifi during a game of candy crush saga.”