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by dvo | October 23, 2016 · 8:00 am

Prisons reform on hold to see if prison deaths can reduce recividism

Liz Truss. We’ll leave you to think of your own caption

Liz Truss is waiting to see if a 27% increase in prisoner self-harm can be translated into actual deaths, before starting on reforms planned by her hapless, pasty-faced predescessor, Michael Gove.

“Signs are encouraging but one swallow of bleach doesn’t make a summer.” Continue reading →

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Filed under Crime, Law and Order, News

Tagged as Evening Harold, Liz Truss, prison deaths, prison reform, satire

by dvo | February 8, 2016 · 11:28 am

Prison suicide rates disappointingly low says Cameron “We can do much better.”

You there, just stop it. Pfft, this rehabilitation is a piece of piss

An array of prisoner rehabilitation schemes, that won’t actually happen, has been announced by David Cameron. These won’t begin later this year, in several poorly managed pilots.

“Evidence shows that carefully planned, targeted initiatives can reduce reoffending.” said the PM “Putting them into practice costs money though, so we’re just going to talk about them instead for publicity, which costs us nothing … this is my best side, thanks.”

“Think of this as the criminal justice system’s Northern Powerhouse or Troubled Families Programme; it will get lots of attention but won’t really exist. Continue reading →