Top 10 Romantic Valentine’s Day Tips

sexy brendaValentine’s Day is here again, and what’s that in the air? Yes, it’s the musky scent of raw romance.
A lot of people ask me how I keep the spark of romance alive in my countless sexual affairs with various villagers, and that got me thinking about the little things I do to keep the love motor running…so here are my top ten tips for a romantic Valentine’s with the special person(s) in your life…Enjoy!
1. Re-enact your first date
There’s a good chance that the beginning of your relationship was the time when you made the most effort to show her your romantic side, so why not turn back the clock and remind her how charming you were when you were first dating?
Think back to your first date — make a reservation at the same place, eat the same food and finger her in the same shop doorway.
2. Surprise them with something thoughtful!
You don’t have to spend a lot of money to show you care. Home-made vouchers she can exchange for a 5-minute rimming session make a lovely gift, or wait until he’s drifting off to sleep, then squat over his face and give him that golden shower he wasn’t expecting.
3. Do something she’s always wanted to do
Spend a Saturday or Sunday afternoon doing an activity she enjoys, like Futanari role play.
4. A photo just for her!
What could be more classic than a fine gold locket with your photo inside? How about a locket with a close-up picture of her hair brush jammed up your love pipe (one of the pics you haven’t uploaded to yet)
5. A little present under his pillow
Put together a little gift and leave it under his pillow: a fresh stool and a note that says “Your love is like my tummy chocolate: dark and delicious”
6. Make a path of rose petals
Anticipation is half the fun of a romantic surprise. Start the excitement when she walks in the door by leaving a trail of rose petals leading to the bedroom, where she’ll find Valentine’s Day gifts. Feel free to go all out with the heart-shaped box of chocolates, red-and-white teddy bears and a speculum to dilate your hoop. Nice gape, ma’am!
7. Learn something together
Team up and take a class at your local college – cooking, salsa dancing or a foreign language – then go home and frig each other stupid.
8. Create a little rivalry
Challenge her to a duel at crazy golf, Flappy Bird or spit-weasel and engage in some flirtatious trash-talking. Up the ante by placing a bet; for example, loser has to give a tramp a gob-job.
9. Add some mystery
Kidnap her! Blindfold her. Drive her around town until she’s thoroughly lost. Then reveal your destination: Her favourite restaurant, maybe a romantic inn, or an old cabin way out in the woods, with like a dungeon in the basement.
10. Try something new
Mix it up in the bedroom by adding a new dimension – chase away the drabs with a threesome. Why not invite a balding middle-aged, slightly overweight guy to join in your steamy girl-on-girl action. Even just to watch. Think about it Sue.

Any tips you’d like to share? Or just want to let me know how things went? E-mail me now at

Or follow me on Twitter – @RealSugarTits69

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