Thatcher statue to be pre-fitted with urinals

In what is being seen across politics as a ‘brilliant compromise’, the statue of Margaret Thatcher being erected in Grantham is to come with pre-fitted urinals.

Sans urinals, the statue had been much criticised, with supporters outnumbered by doubters claiming that as Thatcher did so little for the wider community it would not be appropriate to celebrate her in a public space.

“Now we’ve come up with this idea, no-one can say it’s not good for the people of the town,” explained local councillor R. M. Renfield.

“You can simply admire her as a powerful figure who changed the shape of the country if that’s your bag, or if not, well – it’s very handy if you’re caught short while shopping. A real win-win.”

“It’s also a great time-saver for those of you who were planning to come along and piss on it anyway,” he continued.

“It’s so refreshing to see people from everywhere on the political spectrum getting behind this project. I think it shows that we can all get behind the really important things in life, and perhaps that’s a lesson for all them up at Westminster.”

Large queues are expected of those keen to try out the town’s new amenity first-hand, and locals are being advised to prepare by drinking plenty of water. More than they ever thought it possible to drink.

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