Channel 5 praised for most secretive Big Brother series ever

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Producers at Channel 5 have been congratulated and thanked by the British public for the most secretive series of Big Brother yet.

The current run, which started just over a week ago, has some of today’s biggest names such as Jim Davidson and Lionel Blair yet has still managed to slip under the radar of even the most discerning youthful telly addicts.

Despite the praise given to the makers of the programme they insist the secretive element to this year’s show wasn’t planned. “In fact, the opposite is true. We have done our best to promote it,” Channel 5’s PR department told us.

“Being part of Richard Desmond’s empire means we have had free publicity in the Daily Star. It is just unfortunate for their readers that we are scheduled up against the ten-minute freeview on Desmond’s Television X.

“We do have things planned for our ‘celebrities ‘ that will increase the number of viewers into at least double figures though. The pretty one may take their top off, and the one you vaguely remember from a boy band will fancy someone else. It’s gripping.

“But the evictions will remain the highlight , especially when what’s-her-name comes out and moans about that other one.” At this point we had to call an ambulance as the spokesperson fell into a boredom-induced coma.

Apathy towards the reality tv show has reached levels not seen since the 2010 general election, but unlike the general election the public still have the weekly option to get rid of the prats.

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