Tag Archives: Children in Need

Children unite for ‘Wogan in Need’ campaign


A sad, broken figure.

Children everywhere have got together for a grand event on Friday to raise awareness of Terry Wogan, following the well-beloved national treasure’s recent back problems, which meant him being forced to pull out of something.

“Many people today don’t realise the plight of the Wogan today,” explained a child this morning. “That’s why we’re giving our time, to get up there, do a bit of good, give something back, you know?”

“Also, it’s great exposure. We’ve got a book coming out, and sales should go through the roof. To be honest, I couldn’t give a toss about the old git. Er, I mean keep dialling, listeners!”

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Misanthropists brace themselves for Children in Need


Yay! A day of rigidly organised fun!

Today workers all over Harold are getting ready to be surrounded by craaazy colleagues wearing badly thought out fancy dress and selling each other horrible cupcakes in aid of Children in Need.

“It’s the worst day of the year,” said advertising executive, Meya Begum. “I resent being made to feel like a pariah for not finding enforced jollity utterly thrilling. I hate Children in Need. And I also hate children in need. They just dress so badly.” Continue reading

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