Jeremy Hunt says the current NHS crisis is due to a freak meteorological event, known to scientists as ‘winter’.
The hapless health secretary, floundered around various TV studios yesterday, so that journalists and Piers Morgan could take turns to twat him with facts.
“I, err, don’t want to blind you with science” stammered Mr Hunt “but, ahem … ‘Winter is caused by the axis of the Earth in that hemisphere being oriented away from the Sun ’.
Apart from undermining staff self-esteem, Hunt says much of his time is now spent looking for someone to blame.
“The NHS simply wasn’t ready for another Winter because the last one was only 12 months ago. Planning can only go so far and we can’t be expected to cope with bizarre ‘once in 365 days’ events. That’s just a fact of life; or death.”
“So it all goes back to the Labour government. Does anyone know who the last Health Secretary was? Andrew Lansley, was it? Jeremy Corbyn?”