Palmer attracted widespread notoriety for paying $50,000 to hunt and kill Cecil the lion, and so Harold schoolboy Simon Delenay set up a fundraising page to allow the lions a chance to even up the score.
“To be honest, I started the page as a bit of a joke, but then the donations came flooding in” said Delaney. “I knew people hated the poaching of endangered animals, but what really surprised me is how much people detest over-charging dentists.”
Simon Delaney said as well as the substantial financial assistance pledged, he’d received a number of well-meaning suggestions on how to conduct the hunt.
“Hunting dentists is technically illegal in Minnesota, so we’ll tie sacks of money and a picture of a young dental hygenist to the back of a pick-up and lure Palmer out of hiding to North Dakota where Cecil’s relatives will be waiting to finish him off. It’s all as nature intended, killing the dominant alpha-dentist improves the bloodline.”
Delaney insisted the hunt would be conducted humanely. “Unlike what Cecil was subject to, there will be no long, protracted torture. The lions will simply round the dentist up up, secure him in a chair, offer him a glass of water, and bite his head off.”
“The dentist can rest assured he won’t feel a thing”.