World gets even worse as Phil Collins announces comeback

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“Miss me?”

As Gaza, ebola, Iraq and flesh-eating zombies dominate the headlines – well, maybe not the zombies but would you be surprised? – the world is today facing up to a new horror: Phil Collins has announced that he is coming out of retirement.

“I can barely get my head around how violent and awful things are at the moment,” said Harold resident, Carly Jeffery. “And now this. I feel like going back to bed until it’s all blown over.”

“I am reminded of the Bard,” local actor Digby Burns told us. “Who wrote that when sorrows come, they come not in single spies, but in battalions.”

“Shakespeare can be hard to interpret however what I think he’s clearly saying here is ‘brace yourselves because now Collins is back we can only be but days away from Bono’.”

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5 responses to “World gets even worse as Phil Collins announces comeback

  1. Should have stayed behind the drum kit,never a replacement for Gabriel and turned Genesis into mor pop group.

  2. One grave…McCartney…Phil and Elton…big hole…three for one…one shot…easy…Gaston …make sure they don’t wake up…Oui Monsieur…c’est fait…

  3. Phil Collins actually was the only singer around whose voice could approximate that of Gabriel’s on so many of Genesis’ Gabriel-era songs. I saw The Lamb Lies Down on Broadway live with Peter Gabriel in Atlanta, which was really amazing. But with Collins at the helm, with his live voice being almost identical to Gabriel’s (what were the chances, as Gabriel’s voice was ridiculously unique and weird), Genesis became one of the most amazing bands you could see anywhere, in the late 70’s/early 80’s. I remember taking people who didn’t even know who they were who were just blown away by Genesis live back then. And that was playing all the awesome (non-pop) stuff that Genesis was famous for, in downright epic live fashion. After Gabriel quit, several years and two more albums of Pure Genesis Gold ensued before things took a pop turn, and that was a band decision, not a Collins decision, and sure, they became bigger than ever, and finally made some money after all those years of touring on no radio hits. Genesis really raised the bar in rock stage performance inn the late 70’s and early 80’s, and they kept to the true Genesis prog sensibility, at least up through that time.

    Should have stayed behind the kit? If so, Genesis would have died before the 70’s came to a close.

    Never a replacement for Gabriel? This proves you did not see Genesis live, during, at least, the 7 years after Gabriel quit. He was born to front a huge band on stage, and he proved it during that time, hands down.