With the US government on shutdown and showing no signs opening up for business, the Statue of Liberty has decided to up foundations and return to Europe.
Having achieved dual nationality in 1886, the gift from ‘the people of France’ claims she has not been paid in over a week.
The Statue said: “I find myself having to choose between a country that shuts down because the president threatens to give healthcare to all its citizens and a Europe run by Angela Merkel.
“I’m covered in pigeon shit where I haven’t been washed for two weeks, and I have hair growing under my arms that would even make a European woman blush. I think I’ll fit in well”
Liberty has been looking into a number of countries to call home. Italy was a strong favourite until Silvio Berlusconi revealed he now has a thing for older women. She says she holds a flame for many people, but she does have standards.
Her Native France is a strong contender but Greece is a clear favourite. “I understand that my posture could be provocative in Europe, but I think a permanently outstretched arm will be accepted by some in Athens. I’m looking forward to this new Golden Dawn in my life.”