Pippa Delaney’s Guide to Life (13/05/2013 to 20/05/2013



Hello my darling Haroldites!!

Well, it seems that spring has well and truly sprung here in Harold and the season of outdoor activities is upon us once again, although certain villagers appear to like outdoor activities which are altogether more suited to indoors.  Preferably in a sound proofed room and without the entire village hearing what sounds like a re-enactment of the Viking invasion.

Things in Veggie! Veggie! Veggie! have been frantic this week, what with the number of bus parties stopping by to back the village’s plan to declare independence from Bedfordshire, and to see what may eventually become the site of the HSB 2. 

We’ve been busy too developing our own range of organic, free-range ice creams and sorbets, although interest in the Yak’s Milk and Nettle frozen yoghurt hasn’t been as great as we’d hoped with customers still insisting on wanting ‘traditional’ vanilla or tutti frutti flavours.  Still, Rome wasn’t built in a day and I’m sure I will eventually persuade our parochial morons customers that other options can be just as delicious!

Of course, the start of the nice weather also brings with it the season of Folk Festivals and Church Fetes, and it’s lovely to see the likes of local lad Seth Barley overcome his ‘problems’ to bring musical joy to the village.

I believe though, that certain quarters have been bitching bemoaning that I have declined to allow the Church Fete to be held on our lawn this year.  May I just say that this is due to Health and Safety regulations and not my personal decision.  The Public Liability Insurance requirements and costs are just too prohibitive and it seems silly to have to erect secure fencing around our extensive Koi carp and Zen pond and to close off access to our gorgeous pool just because some villagers are just too thick a danger to themselves should never be allowed to breed likely to drown.  And sadly, since the Church refuses to meet the costs of the Insurance, it’s no longer possible for the Fetes to be held at the Old Vicarage.

I’m sure the Village Green will be an adequate alternative. (Although I hope someone will be picking up all the dog poo first.)

The Rev. Tansy was understandably a little disappointed that we would not be upholding the village’s traditions, although I think her reaction was perhaps a little unnecessary.  Perhaps spend a little more time on the spirituality and less on the ‘spirits’ at your next retreat Tansy?

Well my lovely Haroldites, I must get on. I have a bit of a staffing issue to deal with, but rest assured, Ceaserina should be back to her normal, cheerful self in no time!

Until next week,

Pippa X