A seagull who fell into a vat of curry launched a bid to be President of all the Seagulls by saying he will ban all migratory birds from the UK.
The newly bright orange gull nicknamed ‘Donald’ immediately blamed his plight on foreign birds who come to the UK stealing prime seaside food scraps from under the noses of local birds, forcing them to scavenge in less desirable locations such as curry houses.
“British scraps for British birds” squawked Donald, who also called for a 4 mile high wall to be built in the middle of the English Channel to stop free-loading French birds flying in for a free lunch.
Donald’s anti-immigration squawks quickly attracted a large crowd of gulls who were sympathetic to his views, and Nigel Farage and Katie Hopkins, until the rally was abruptly halted by a sprinting, arm-waving 4 year old boy.
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