Ukip have come under increasing pressure to stop getting their tit out in public. After offering its opinions on a wide range of issues from immigration to breastfeeding, critics have said although they respect the right of the party to get their tit out in public, many people find it ’embarrassing’ and occasionally ‘offensive’.
Defending their stance, a campaigner for public decency said: “We understand that sometimes they have to get him out, and that is often dictated by nature.
“For example, when there a foreigner that he’s not married to to have a go at or there’s the scent of a rather nice ale in the air.
“But is it too much to ask for them to perhaps get him out in a corner, hidden away, covered with a towel, maybe even with a bit of gaffa tape over his mouth. Anything to stop them offending those around him that may not want to see an over-exposed tit.”
“At least mothers are keeping their babies alive when they breastfeeding. The only use for Ukip’s tit is to feed its own ego.”
Ukip have reacted angrily to the idea and said it should be up to individual businesses if they wish to let them get their tit out in their premises.
“We plan to get our tit out more and more in the run up to the election, and after our recent by-election successes we now have a couple of cocks we can wave about as well.”
The party did have to make one apology though.
In a statement they said: “We would like to apologise for any offence caused by our leader’s epic 45 minutes rant. He misheard the request to cover him with a muslin.”
