Armchair exerciser demands lightweight bike for heavy exercise

If only McKean had the right light equipment

For some reason, an overweight man with plans to cycle his way to fitness is only able to do so on the lightest bike around.

“On an old steel-framed one, forty miles of a Sunday morning would take ages” wheezed William McKean, after his partner noticed he’d been googling ‘Titanium frames for under £1000?’ from the sofa.

Harold’s fattest man, McKean is best known locally as the star of the TV documentary Help! My Liver is the size of a Dog.

“I think he should try my nan’s sit-up-and-beg first. It’s in the shed, behind the broken Black and Decker 12 inch rotary lawnmower.” said McKean’s partner “It’s got a wicker basket, Sturmey Archer three-speed gears stuck in top, and the frame is made from reclaimed manhole covers.”

“If he can ride that bugger two miles to work and back every day, he wouldn’t need to go forty miles at weekends. Anyway, if we’ve a grand to spare, it should go on some lightweight dumbbells for my home gym. The set I’m using now are really heavy.”

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