Oh great – it’s a nuclear pissing contest and one guy loves golden showers

The world is resigned to Armageddon after the realisation that at least one of the leaders in the US / North Korean nuclear pissing contest positively welcomes a golden shower.

“We’re screwed. Trump is goading Kim Jong-un to fire an ICBM tipped in prostitute’s piss in our direction” sighed Washington DC cab driver Ed Stevens.

“If only we had the UK’s David Cameron as our President. I don’t think the North Koreans have the technology to fit a dead pig into the tip of an ICBM.”

Stevens said he’d bought an umbrella and a nose peg but he wasn’t holding out much hope.

“Why can’t we just have a normal President who sticks his willy in a vacuum cleaner hose while wearing women’s underwear and watching Pamela Anderson videos?” exclaimed Stevens.

“I mean that’s just one hypothetical example I plucked out of the air, but you know what I mean.”

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